Rob and I decided to sign up to run in the upcoming UNC Kidney Center Kidney Kare 5K run. Click here for the link.
We just signed up today. The race is March 20, exactly 5 weeks away. That's not a lot of time to get aerobically ready to complete a 5K race, but that's okay. I just want to finish the 5K with as little walking as possible. When I run, I'm sure I'll be jogging at a very slow pace (at least, slow for me), and I'm okay with that. If it turns into a jog for a few minutes, walk for 1 minute, jog again, then walk...repeating until I cross the finish line, that's great and I will count that as a successful finish!
There is a "Dialysis Patient" category for the run which is really cool. Also, a category for people who have already had a kidney transplant. I wonder if we can get our friend who dialyzes with Rob to consider doing it with us? (hint, hint! Not naming any names...) And maybe we can ask our new friend who we just met through Facebook who was successfully transplanted back in 2007. Hmmm, this could be fun!
So...we've got 35 days to "get in shape" before the "race". I put both of those in quotes because they mean something totally different to us than they used to.
A handful of years ago, a friend and I were discussing big life kind of questions, and I was asked, "Danielle, what do you think the meaning of life is?"
I answered, "To achieve success in every thing I do, especially in bike racing and swimming." Of course my answer wasn't just that, as it included "get married and buy a house with a white picket fence and pop out 2 or 3 kids" and to "teach and lead others to live happy, successful lives". Which is kind of funny, because at the time, I thought I was happy and on my way to a successful life, when in reality, I was far from it!
Exercise and competition drove me daily. I dreamed about it and thought constantly about exercise and being the best that I could be. A day without exercise (aside from structured rest days) was horrible and I would beat myself up in my head, telling myself I was lazy and I'd amount to nothing if I stayed in that pattern. When I would see the results of good training, grabbing a podium finish at a race, it made me prideful.
Now, "get in shape" to me, means treating my body in a way that is healthy; choosing to eat healthy foods, eating snacks and desserts in moderation, and exercising moderately to achieve a healthy amount of aerobic fitness. But as of yesterday, I was not treating my body in a way that is healthy. I've fallen into a rut of no exercise, eat what you want, when you want. And my excuse for this 2.5 year rut is, well, that's just not who I am anymore. Who I used to be was Danielle: the bike racer and swim coach. Those were the 2 things that mattered the most to me. Who am I now? I'll take a stab at my new definition. Danielle: a born again Christian who loves God, a devoted wife to Rob, who seeks to serve others before serving myself (falling into selfishness). I'm not a bike racer by any stretch of the imagination anymore. And I'm not a swim coach anymore...well, not like I used to be.
So why am I wanting to "get in shape" and complete this 5K? Is it to raise kidney awareness? Not really. Is it so that I can lose a little bit of weight and hopefully fit back into my closet full of size 10 pants? No, although that would be nice (chuckle, chuckle). Is it an attempt to add a part of my old life into my new life, while giving glory to God for that addition? No, I don't think so.
I still don't have a definite answer for why I want to "get in shape" and complete this 5K...but I'm thinking it has something to do with my new meaning of life, the part about serving others. It takes a certain amount of energy and physical fitness to serve others with joy in my heart. Overweight and sluggish is how I've been feeling after doing anything remotely active with children or cleaning my house. I don't know about you, but overweight and sluggish isn't a joyful feeling. But is it really all about "feelings"? No. Is it all about what I do, and why I do it? I think yes, I may be getting close...
I'm sorry I'm rambling on like this! But think about this:
Have you ever really thought about the things you fill your life with, the things you do...and WHY you do them? I'm not talking about the basic life necessities like making dinner or brushing your teeth, duh, we all know why we do those things...but why do I choose to ride my bike? Why do I read my Bible? Why do I jog or go for a hike with my dogs? Why do I pray? Go for a swim? Take a nap? Waste a couple hours on the internet? Help my neighbor do something they can't do by themselves? Talk with a close friend, listen to their problems, pray for them?
Well, my brain is done! I've rambled on for too long!
But I sure am excited about this Kidney Kare run!
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Hmmm.....I did a 5K about 5 years ago. I wasn't in good shape then, and now I'm in about 5x worse shape. But this could be like a baseline, a basis for improvement in future 5Ks...will think about. :)
ReplyDeleteGreat job girl! It's amazing how we find ourselves with different lives and dreams from where we originally started. I am definitely not the same as I was, yet I am on many different levels. :) When I trained for the marathon, Why? was the biggest question I got. Here was my favorite answer: Because I can. I wanted to do something that pushed myself and that when people look at me, would never ever think, "Wow...she did a marathon." I don't look the part at all. I'm a mom. I'm oldish. I'm a wife. How and why could I possibly want to do something like that? Simple. Because I could. Because I wanted to prove that even someone like me is able to accomplish something extraordinary at least once. :)
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